Frenzied Daddy

Miss K is at a stressful age for a father who sometimes just wants to be left alone. She’s determined to get her fair share of time, attention, candy and presents. Sometimes she drives me to the city limits of insanity by climbing into my lap, pushing on me with her feet on my legs and her head under my chin so the chair reclines (either the office chair or the recliner), or asking me to color with her, read her a book, get her some food, find her a kitten, whatever.

Yes, even when I’ve just arrived home from work! Yes, when I’m trying to get some “down time” — yes! When I tell her to go bug someone else! I love her, and I love doing all that stuff with her, but seriously, sometimes daddy’s lap is daddy’s lap!

Anyway, she gets me to the suburbs of insanity, and then she looks up at me and tells me she’s got a secret to tell me. She wants to whisper it in my ear. Gritting my teeth, I bend forward to hear it and what does she say?

“Daddy, I love you. You’re very special to me. Don’t tell anyone else- this is a secret.”

Jeez. Make me cry why dontcha.

– god.

What is with you people? Isn’t it enough that Incomprehensible Twit Palin has a chance to be the President of the US in the next four years? Isn’t it enough that Bush has given himself the authority to delay the elections? Isn’t it enough that for the first time ever, an active army unit has been assigned to “Army North” in order to support homeland security measures? Isn’t it enough that the Republican “maverick” has voted with Bush’s policies 95 percent of the time?

This past week, thousands of copies of the anti-Muslim propaganda piece Obsession was spread throughout Ohio ( a swing state ) through newspapers and through the mail. Friday night, while 300 Muslims were in church celebrating the end of Ramadan, some (expletive deleted) sprayed a hand held canister of “chemical irritant” into the room where babies and children were playing and waiting for their parents. Someone tear gassed their daycare!

McCain’s supporters were distributing the DVDs; a group called the “Clarion” group. Well, I have a clear, bugle call to the “Clarion” group- your DVD has encouraged terrorism by Americans against Americans. I hope that McCain denounces you and that you lose any support you might have gained.

Tear gassing toddlers! I’m astounded!

Just when I think my daddyhood couldn’t get any worse, Miss K decides to show me how very wrong I am.

Miss B, Ms B and I were laying in the big bedroom (Ms B’s and Mine), in front of the fan, reading and working. I see Miss K with the gentle leader, she takes it over to Perrin and hooks him up. He’s not choking or anything, so she must have done it right. I go back to my work, and Miss K and Perrin leave the room. I’m listening to the sounds; I’m expecting to hear her crying or him barking or some sort of disaster but I don’t hear anything. I’m also expecting Miss B and Ms B to have noticed that Miss K was up to something.

I’m working on a piece of code and need to get it out of my head before I forget about it. A lot of my work is like that; my breaks come between pieces of code. It’s very creative-process-y.

I involve myself in the code, not hearing any noise ( but I can hear the fan and the radio, I’m not totally zoned ), and tell myself that I’ll find Miss K after this function block. Before I finish, however, I hear a voice. I look up from the computer and listen more closely; I can’t decide if it’s the radio or not, and I’m about to ask the Bs if they hear it too, when SS, our neighbor, comes into the room. She had let herself in, through the open front door.

Apparently Miss K had walked Perrin out of the house and down the street (away from the busy street, deeper into the neighborhood ) and had gotten about 4 or so houses down before someone noticed her. They asked SS if she (Miss K) was hers, but it wasn’t until SS actually saw her that she realized that it was Miss K. I was astounded that Perrin hadn’t pulled her over or anything, that he was politely walking along with her. And when SS picked her up to bring her home, Miss K threw an unholy temper tantrum– as if Miss K believed that she was doing the right thing; it was like the two of them had teamed up and were going for a walk come Heck or High Water.

Sigh.

I guess I have to put locks on our gates too